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implicating:

*texts bae at 3am* hey baby, according to this buzzfeed quiz you’re only 48% in love with me ????? hmm 📝

angryinterrobang:

I got in trouble at work again for whispering ‘weird’ things to the babies.

Look, if you’re allowed to call the infant a little flirt or heartbreaker I don’t see what’s so wrong with me cooing that they’re going to have a personality someday. Ooh, look at how good you are at paying attention! I bet you’re gonna get into a lot of arguments yes you are! Yes you are. Who’s a going to be an interesting person one day? Maybe you, tiny baby. Maybe.

"You deserve to have someone you don’t have to worry if they’ll still like you the next day."
-I woke up thinking about this. (via notyourmamita)

cheatcommandos:

its 1:42 am and i just heard the unmistakeable sound of someone sprinting down the road wearing flip flops. good luck buddy

kiss ya girls thighs